good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
