Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
