Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
