She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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