I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize