I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
