I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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