Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
