One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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