when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
