I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Randomize
