no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
