Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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