I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Go christen that room with your naked body.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
