Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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