sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
My vagina is very pro this idea
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
