we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
