I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
The uberlube is also flammable
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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