The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
