i jhust puked up my retainher.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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