I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
