Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
