there's paper in my vomit.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
