Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
