i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
