just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
