I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
