Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
