I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
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