You work out of a Hotel?
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
