we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Naked Twister starts at high noon
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
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