Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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