Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
