I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Randomize
