The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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