i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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