u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
