but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
