the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
So. Much. Porn.
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