wat bout pragnant strippers??
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
