i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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