We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Randomize
