you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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