Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
