My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Randomize
