I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
