Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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