Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
