Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
