Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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