Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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