Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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